Fear of Failure

The fear of failure can do many things. It can either get you to do nothing or it can drive you to feel bad about yourself when you don't get the results you expected, AKA when you failed. This got me thinking, why does this happen? Why are we too hard on ourselves? It's like having a demanding boss at work isn't enough so we have to be our own demanding bosses too and punish ourselves whenever we make mistakes. Well I say we don't. Whenever we fail at something the only thing left is to try again and take advantage of that situation and turn it into a positive outcome. Being mad, disappointed or frustrated will not get us anywhere. It will only make the process more dreadful and just plain sad. I don't know you, but when I fail at something suddenly my whole day turns into this gloomy, sad, depressing day. My attitude towards life that day just...changes. But it doesn't have to be that way.

Here are three steps on how to handle failure:

1. Acknowledge the result. Understand the reality of the situation along with it's consequences, but don't exaggerate the outcome. Don't let your mind wonder too much about what is going to happen or what could happen. I'm not saying not to look at the whole range of possibilities I'm just saying, if you failed an exam don't go off thinking you'll never become a doctor and your doomed for life. You get me?

2. Figure out a solution. This is something my boyfriend tells me quite a lot. I tend to just express the situation or problem but I never address a solution to it. This leads to even more frustration because you just end up stuck there.

3. Take action. If your solution includes something you can do today, do it. If not, set it aside and enjoy the rest of your day. If there is nothing you can do today, why ruin your mood thinking about the situation and lose the amazing opportunity of enjoying maybe a cup of coffee with some company or maybe discovering a new place?

Everyday has something wonderful to offer. Fears can sometimes blind us from seeing the bigger picture. It can blind us from seeing what is really important in life: your happiness.

At the end of the day, we shouldn't feel bad or guilty about doing something that makes us happy. Never sacrifice your mental health for anything, not even because you failed at something important. You have to remind yourself that you are awesome and you deserve to be happy.

xoxo,

N